life keeps moving..

i got up and got ready for an interview at another hotel in burnsville. i haven't been there in a while, so it looked different considering i USED to live there and was forced to pretty much waste away all my potential for people who only care about appearing "caring" to other people, so i didn't get much work experience until i finally moved from that dump. it must have been on a different side of the city from which i used to live at, although if it's around where cub foods USED to be located before they tore it down(like i'm pretty sure it is- i remember going to that part of the city for groceries in my wheelchair all the time and going to the taco bell in that area also). when i got there, i walked to the front desk and told the guy at the front desk i was there for an interview, then some other short lady walked up to the counter and she asked me, "are you interviewing for housekeeping?" haha.. that's the first question they ALWAYS ask me. probably because a lot of housekeepers for hotels are typically little mexican ladies. i said, "no. front desk." then she said that she'd have to interview me since the lady who scheduled the interview with me was out of the office for the day, so another lady interviewed me. she said to me almost right away, "i see you're living in st. paul.. so that's close.." they must have a lot of other people who live far away applying for the job because i iniatially thought they'd make that a reason not to hire me (because i was located too far away). i guess it wasn't THAT long of a ride though. one of the only reasons they may not hire me is because i don't have hotel experience but i hope the jobs i've worked/volunteered for dealing with hospitality make me look more qualified. i hope they'll consider my previous work experience when deciding whether or not to hire me because another hotel said the same thing about me lacking hotel experience but they noted that i worked jobs in hospitality.. so it was basically the same thing. she also went out of her way to mention they're looking for people who are good with computers and she seen my data entry experience, i hope she sees that i took classes in college for information systems management.. so i'm also good with computers. i believe she said she'd get back to me by monday or tuesday if i got the job.
i pretty much just came to the realization of why my family isn't supportive of my goals (except joe). they aren't personally familiar with the goals i have and so they can only support me to do things they're familiar with. THIS IS MY LIFE. i didn't go through ALL the shit i've been through just to live off social security in some small town, chainsmoking, drinking pepsi, and talking to my dogs. sound familiar, mom? i realize i have MORE potential than that and if you can't support or even encourage me- i don't see ANY reason to stay in contact with you. GO CRY TO GRANDMA'S FRIENDS, OUR FAMILY MEMBERS WHO ARE ACTUALLY WILLING TO LISTEN TO YOUR SHIT, and anyone else even willing to waste their time listening to an egotistical, negative, and entitled sad excuse of a mom. you're probably just upset that you can't cause any more problems in my life (two surgeries and excruciating abdominal pain come to mind WHICH YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR.. the other parent who did the kicking, is dead.. so God took care of him- you didn't need to bring me into the fight between you and my dad- you should've tried to remove me from the quarrel as soon as possible.. NOT USE MY BODY AS A FUCKING SHIELD WHEN MY DAD WAS KICKING YOU- were your flying monkeys there? DID THEIR MOM USE THEM AS A SHIELD WHEN THEIR DAD WAS KICKING THEM? NO. SO CAN IT. my dreams reminiscing being kicked by my dad because of YOU and the bowel surgeries along with the immense bowel pain PROVE IT). i'm NOT thanking your stupid ass for taking care of me after my car accident because i remember hearing you whine to grandma how you didn't wanna take care of me and i remember being left ALONE while i was wheelchair dependant at your old apartment. SO NO. YOU CAN BOTH GO SCREW YOURSELVES- THAT INCLUDES YOUR FESTIVELY PLUMP DAUGHTER. call me ungrateful or wtf bullshit you want but it doesn't mean a DAMN thing until YOUR mom has used your body as a shield while your dad was kicking her and expects you to throw away EVERYTHING you've busted your ass off for to get where you are.
i got a text message from another apartment in massachusetts to respond to their waiting list on the housing program. i have about 13 or 14 days to get back to them. the ics worker said she'll help me send the response back but i'm thinking it'll probably take a while going through the mail- so she said she'll help me respond electronically when she gets to my apartment in about 15 minutes for my ics session.